The Parade Passes By

It's frightening how many writing and editing jobs are out there, but what's more frightening is how ill qualified I am for many of them.

I've been editing copy and designing pages for decades, but today's newspaper employers are looking for Web skills that I would have to brush up on, if not outright acquire. One of my rules in choosing what jobs to apply for is: If you don't know what the job is, don't apply. Content producer, for example. Exactly what is a content producer? Is it just someone who can write diatribes on any subject to fill the available space (which I would, of course, be very good at), or is it someone who has to know how to write diatribes that are cleverly loaded with keywords that will land said diatribes on Google's Page One? Maybe a content producer doesn't even write! I don't know!

Still, I may have to rethink that rule if I really want to get a job.

Then there are the employers who want people who have social media marketing savvy, which I don't, although I'm somewhat willing to learn.

Adding insult to injury, the temporary agency I signed up with last week pretty much told me no one would want me for my office skills, which were last relevant in the early '90s.

I told Kayti recently, "I finally figured out a career I would enjoy. And it's really surprising, because it's not something I ever would have associated with myself."

Kayti said, "Cosmetology?"

Which made me laugh, because that's even more outlandish than accounting, which is the one I came up with.